My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others
Here I am sitting here on Christmas Eve alone and watching football. It is then that I think to myself I must be the only person in the world that thinks the way that I think. I must be the only person who loves the way I love. Because you see, in my head and as a 23-year-old out here on her own, it just doesn’t make sense to me how not one person in her family circle can call her on Christmas. Or Christmas Eve for that matter. It just doesn’t make sense to me.
Are you that consumed with yourself that you can’t take two seconds to reach out? Are you really that selfish? What is family for anyway? Then I think, well I’m not the only person. There was another person who thought the way I think, he’s just no longer here with me. Someone else who knew what unconditional love was. Then came the tears. A lot of tears. It’s my first Christmas without my papa and a real family for that matter. And it just wasn’t a fun day for me.
It just astonishes me how selfish my family can be. My immediate family at that. I’ve always said that I’m going places in this world and I’ve always said I’m not bringing them with me. Well, this year has shown me that even if I wanted them to come they can’t go where I’m going. That’s just not the hand I’ve been dealt. This year has provided me with more clarity than any other year of my life thus far. It’s something I have come to accept as part of my journey. But that wasn’t the only clarity I received in 2018.
Last night provided me with clarity on another subject I haven’t been too fond of, social media. Thanks to one person and one social media post, last night got a little bit better for me. Which proved to me that some good can come out people sitting around and staring at their phones all day. With one comment made on Instagram last night, I’ve received over 3,500 messages last night from people sending their love to me this Christmas.
I cannot even begin to express the love and joy that it brought to me, just to be reminded that I am not alone. For that reason alone, my heart is full this Christmas. All you need is love. Love is all you need. Giving it is just not that hard.